Parenting
– Mothers and Daughters
There seem
to be loads of articles and books written lately about parenting. Even though the statistics show that more
Americans are living alone, there are still many parents around who seek advice
about the best way to bring up children.
As a
grandmother of a four year old, whose mother was my only daughter, born when I
was 36 years old, I am still fascinated by these articles. My daughter and I often laugh when she has
the same problems with her daughter that I had when she was that age and the discussion usually ends
with the perennial “Now you know!”
Recently we
both read an article in the NY Times about differences over parenting and how
it results in problems with close friends who might disagree with methods used
in bringing up baby. I know better than to interfere with any such
differences of opinion involving my own granddaughter, but I can empathize with
new parents who have confronted these issues with their own children.
For example,
this month my granddaughter, Maya, started experiencing separation anxiety when
my daughter left her at her pre-kindergarten class in the morning and before
going to sleep almost every night. This
is strange because it didn’t happen when she first started pre-school last year
and at the beginning of the fall term in September. Some parents might agonize over this
situation – wondering if it was something they said or did that brought on this
behavior.
My daughter
just handled it the way she always confronts any mini-crisis involving Maya – with a sense of humor and a
confirmation that there had to be a solution to the problem. Since Maya spends two evenings a week going
to sleep at my home, we decided to discuss with her what would make her feel
better about missing mommy. Maya said she wanted me to sing her a lullaby
before she went to sleep (something I used to do for her mother when she was a
toddler.) We tried it and it worked. True I had to dredge up some of the songs of
the past, but we both really enjoy it now and look forward to bedtime.
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